One day at a time....

Enjoy the little things in life, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.

So true.
And it's like the saying about You'll never see the trees if you keep looking at the forest.
mmm hmmmm

I'm a here and now kind of person. Live in the moment. Granted, it's good to have goals and a plan for the future. But sometimes...you gotta just live for the now.

And God love my husband, he doesn't remember things like he used to. So, he's always going over things in his mind and asks me the same things over and over not realizing we've discussed it before. From my end...I can usually tolerate it. But catch me on "one of those days" and I know I don't handle it the way I probably should. (I'm sorry honey) Not to mention...how can you repeatedly tell someone something like that without them getting angry or frustrated? It's hard really. What do you do?

And we know we're leaving. This stupid yo-yo roller coaster ride with dates and such is getting pretty old. My daughter is already having a hard enough time adjusting to leaving. So, to be able to enjoy the time we have left here would be wonderful. Without being hell-bent on going.  We may not absolutely LOVE it here. But we don't hate it. And we do love some of the things/people here. So, why can't we enjoy the time we have left. We shouldn't make ourselves hate it so we can go go go faster when the army isn't going to let it happen like that. We're along for the ride...so I'm taking pictures.

It's spring break this week. It pretty much sucks so far. Between a severe allergy attack that kept me in bed for almost four days and nothing but rain rain rain, I'd like to request a do-over. Starting.....hmmm...NOW!!
If only...

Breathe....

It's a dreary Sunday morning. A little chilly and everything is wet from rain. But it almost has a spring-like feel to it. What happened to winter? Whatever it is...let's just keep moving forward. After the tease of warmer temps, I can't imagine the thoughts of snow or a blizzard now. Spring fever is officially hitting.
I spent some time with my neighbor sitting on her front porch drinking coffee this morning. This has become a ritual for us. Weekend mornings sitting on the steps of her porch drinking a cup of coffee just chit chatting about whatever comes to mind. It's definitely something I'm gonna miss when we move back home.
I think the reality of us moving has been looming over this house for it seems like months. It's definitely a bittersweet feeling. But at the same time, it's scary leaving the military. This has been our life for some time now and leaving the security of it into the unknown has been weighing on the whole family. We're at the phase that we're waiting on paperwork to be transcripted and sent off for the Army to decide if he's fit for duty. Even though the doctors here have already said he's not. It always comes down to the Army's final word. And the usual hurry up and wait game.
I'm excited at the thoughts of being near family again. The comfort of seeing them at any given moment. There's excitement about a new house and decorating making it our home. That's always been a positive to moving with the military. But this time...it's going to be our's. Hopefully anyway.
I think what worries me most is my daughter. She's dealing with leaving friends she's had for the past three years. And leaving in the middle of a high school career she's been working so hard on. I know she's struggling with this. And it breaks my heart that I don't know how to help her adjust to this. I do know that where ever we go, and whatever school she goes to, she's going to be fine. It's going to suck for a little while, but I'm praying she can see the good that will come from this move and eventually be excited, or at least happy, about it. As for now, we're making the most of being here in Kansas and enjoying friends and her musicals. All I can do is pray because I definitely don't know what else to do.

I've had a catch in my neck for four days now. I can only assume it's from stress I'm probably holding in. Or I can just say I slept wrong. Which is probably also a truth. Nothing has seemed to be a miraculous cure for it though. Muscle relaxers, massages, electric shock, bio-freeze. I've done it all. I even got hubby to pop my back for me. All of these things help a little...but the knots are still there and the pain is getting annoying. I must practice how to relax again. It's funny how I recall years ago being a single mom with stressors piled up in my life, I would meditate and do yoga and practice relaxing. But now, do I fall back on those things to help the tension? oooh no! Stubborn? maybe. I definitely need to do something though. Frooooshrababa. Is that how that goes?? HAHAHA My hubby says that and it cracks me up (no I haven't seen that movie...whatever it is that it came from). 
My motto right now is............ B r e a t h e.  I can do that. just breathe.

Famous Quotes of the Week

Quotes that may not be famous yet...but they should be.

"Sheesh Mom....grow some ovaries!!" - my 16 year old daughter

"Ay. Ay. Ay. Ay" (as said in the tone of the seagulls on Finding Nemo) - my 16 year old daughter and her two 16 year old friends on a car ride home.

"Mine. Mine. mine. mine." - the soldier working gate guard duty after hearing previous quote and spoken in the same tone of the seagulls on Finding Nemo

"Mrs. Shackelford, thanks for what you do." - one of the students where I work  :)

"I think I've seen that movie" - me, after hearing the teenage girls conversation about a movie showing teenagers trying to decide what movie to watch.

"I went to the commissary, but I just got the necessities." - my hubby, after purchasing Coca-cola and milk. My world is complete. :)

"I think you're in a better place now than you were a few months ago." - my counsellor. :)

It's getting real.

I've been working pretty hard on the photography thing lately. I have finished all my classes and I'm down to the last two projects. I've been racking my brain on one of the projects for weeks now trying to decide what to do. It's a still life project with the scenario being for an art gallery. I'm trying to stay away from anything that looks commercial, which is what my thoughts tend to drift back to. My artistic muse is spinning it's wheels. Definitely time to do some random, thoughtless, creative shoots that will kick-start my genius creativity.
I've done 5 studio shoots in the past week. All of which are sitting on an SD card waiting to be editted since my computer went in for repair a week ago. Do you know how lost it feels not having the computer? It's not like I don't have three other computers in the house. But that one is MY computer I do ALL my work on. But I can say, the Geek Squad at Best Buy have this wonderful tracker. I've tracked the progress on my computer every day. And it's finally been received, repaired, and shipped back to the store. I'm just waiting for it to reach the store and I get the call/notification that I can pick it up. Which will mean I will drop everything that day and go get it. HA!
I've also been working on getting my photography business up and running. Not that I wasn't already doing professional shoots. BUT...I have a studio set up now, as well as a light kit. I feel so professional. It's getting real. So, I spent yesterday morning taking inventory of all my equipment and props. I'm no where near done with this list. I just have a general version of it right now. But I have technical work to do as far as keeping track of serial numbers, etc. My files with equipment receipts, etc have been started. I've got a rough outline of the contract I will be using, as well as estimates, rights releases, etc. I also have business cards ready to be designed and printed. AND my portfolio is a constant work in progress. I need to have those shots printed and placed in this spectacular portfolio binder that I can thank my mother for (thanks Mom!).
I went through all the pictures I've done during photo shoots this weekend and I've realized how far I've come in just this past year. My compositions, poses, lighting, everything has gotten so much better. I'd like to say it's from the classes I've taken, but I think most of it has been through practice. And I'm so proud of myself and so pleased with how my shots are turning out now. Most of them in the last shoot, I will barely have to touch in the editting process. :) yay me!
here are a few for your viewing pleasure.... (all photos copyright Shari Shackelford 2012. Any use, copying, alterations, etc not authorized!)

Today is a beautiful day and I'm seriously considering going out to take some pics. That is once my arthritis meds kick in and I don't feel like I'm dragging cement blocks around with me.

Stay tuned for more of my photography business. And if you're local, send me a message and I'll get your session scheduled. ;)

Shari

10 for Tuesday

The weeks 10 random thoughts...

1) I've been working on a blog for a few days now about "my story". Actually it's titled "My Totem".  It will all be explained when I post it. But I am working really hard on it and hope to have it perfected in a day or two.

2)  It snowed today. We've gone all winter with very little snow. As compared to last winter when we were hit with blizzards and snowed in for days. I kinda miss a good snow. I say that now. And I may change my mind if it ever happens.

3)  The pup has been whimpering and whining for 3 days now. It concerns me. I want to think she's got a belly ache.  She got a little too much people food, which we normally don't give her. But occasionally give her meat to help her gain weight and help her fur. Maybe not so much in such a short amount of time from now on.

4)  It upsets me when the dog whimpers. It's like a baby cry.  And I don't know what to do to help her. :(

5)  The photo shoots have been few and far between lately. But that's okay. It's either too cold or rainy or something. Another reason I would like to see some snow. I need to do a snow shoot.

6)  GRAPHIC....squeamish....don't read!!!  I've been seeing the doc for some female issues that have been bothering me for quite some time now.  The hysterectomy I had years ago left me with one ovary. Which, i think is covered in cysts again. AND I think they're bursting. I've been in a lot of pain.  Ultrasound scheduled for next week. Hopefully I'll get some answers.

7) I am officially almost finished with my photography classes. I have one class left, then two final project/shoots. I'm really excited to get these done and finally have my certificate in hand.

8)  Is it sad it's not even 8 pm and I could seriously go to bed?

9)  My hubby finally sent for information to see if he qualifies for a PTSD service/therapy dog. :) I'll keep ya posted.

10)  I can't think anymore.

Stop and Listen/Look

I woke up this morning, way too early for a Sunday of course, and took the pup out. As I stepped out on the porch, in Kansas, I had a feeling of being at the beach. The wind is crazy out there today. The air has a touch of warmth to it, but a damp warmth. It must have rained sometime in the night so everything was soggy. The air smelled of moisture and earth. It was somewhat nostalgic to say the least. That's one thing I noticed when I lived at the beach. The completely different nature of the environment compared to what I knew growing up in the mountains. And being in Kansas, having that feeling was completely out of place.
As I walked the dog, I could hear the wind blow through the trees. The huge pine tree down past the house has a distinct sound when the wind blows through it. Almost mechanical. A whirr of tiny parts that toss in the wind as it passes through the branches.
This is my quiet time. I love going outside and noticing things that one doesn't normally stop to look at or listen to in the busy, daily grind of life.
It's like the worn out fuzzy slippers I wear (inside and out). They're so old and falling apart. But I can't bring myself to get rid of them. It's a comfort of something of I've had for so long. Even though they smell like a thousand feet of a high school locker room no matter how many times I wash them, they are still my comfort.
I'm grateful that I have the ability to stop and notice things, no matter how pleasant or smelly in some cases.
I feel more aware of my surroundings and more in tune with my life. Because that's what life is...it's what you're surrounded by. Connecting to what is around you, the earth, the air, your home, your family, is what makes you who you are and brings an enlightened existence.
I'm not sure why I'm so philosophical or whatever you want to call it today. It could be switching my coffee to half caff. Or maybe it's because it's Sunday. I don't know. But it feels pretty good.
I'm going to sit here before the rest of the family wakes up, and drink my half caff coffee, listening to the deafening sound of my husband's computer about to blow up and the dog chewing on a bone she found, and think about where I am today. Maybe today is a good day to go out on a photography adventure since I seem to be in tune with the world around me. 

Have a good one ya'll! Stop and look at your world today. ;)

Commissary Coupon Musings

I feel hyper. I have an unnatural high all related to couponing and the commissary.
I went to the commissary (for you civilians...grocery store) today by myself. It was a rather enjoyable experience even though I sat in the parking lot for a moment dreading the hassle.  I only had a partial list of what we needed which could be a disaster because a) I would buy more than I really needed to and blow the budget or b) I wouldn't get everything I needed. And of course when I got home, I already have 3 items on the list for the next trip before I even got the bags put away.
So, I have noticed before that if you don't shop on payday or near payday (by a few days) more things are on sale. Which is what happened today. Not to mention I had some awesome coupons this trip (Thanks MOM!). And of course this was the shopping period that we were out of all the non-food essentials, such as shampoo, toothpaste, body wash, toilet paper, paper towels, etc.
We had a certain amount budgetted for groceries (as always) so this was my only stressor. But I took my time going through the aisles and picking sale items and items I had coupons for that were financially worth it. My buggy was heavy as I pushed up to the checkout line and I began to worry I'd blown the budget. My hubby can look at a buggy and get down to a few dollars the amount of how much it's going to come to. I dunno how he does it...but it freaks me out just a little bit.
Now, as you military spouses know, commissaries have large lines. No matter what time of the month it may be. And today, it was no different. I'm standing in line going through every single coupon I had to make sure I didn't miss anything. And as I'm doing that, I catch myself checking out buggies surrounding me and the contents that other people were buying. Gasp...I'm one of those people!! And I kept catching myself going through my coupons looking for a savings for other people's carts. REALLY!!! I spotted a couple single soldiers with a buggy half full of frozen items and convenience foods. I know they had to be single because a) two soldiers shopping together with one cart b) aforementioned frozen items and convenience foods and c) no rings on their fingers (yes I notice those things on occasion...not often though).  So, as I'm standing there I was a bit distraught because I had coupons for a good half of the things in their buggy that I wasn't using this trip. So the moral delimma began. Do I offer them the unused coupons from my trusty plastic coupon binder? Or do I just let the guys keep some dignity that they don't have to use coupons. I didn't give them the coupons. Although I gladly would have. I probably could have saved them at least $5. Just sayin'.
So, by the time all was said and done, I went over budget by $21...but by the time the coupons came off, I was only $6 over budget which I could justify from the amount of gas that I had budgeted for my vehicle this payday.
SWEET! I felt sooooo accomplished! I have a high from saving money!
The best deals I got was the Old Spice body wash I got hubby for $0.32. I got Pantene conditioner for free. Secret deodorant for just over $0.20. I hadn't even planned on getting some of those things until a trip to Walmart. But after seeing them on sale...AND having coupons...there's no better way to stock up...and stay under budget.

All in all, I feel good tonight. It's a fend-for-yourself supper night. So, I'm having Roasted Garlic & Black Bean Tostitos Artisan chips...just cause they're that amazing.
My one splurge on a non-diet item. ;)

Have a good one ya'll. Keep on couponing!